Let's Process It

This matter of settling in Pasadena has been quite unsettling for me. In 2003 when I stayed in Switzerland, the director of my school had a saying that has, of course, stuck with me (because he said it everyday). At the end of most of our class sessions, he would stand at the front of the room staring at a group of student's who were totally overwhelmed with what they were learning. He would inevitably say to us, "Ok, I see you are all still taking this in. Let's take some time to process it." He loved to "process," and I didn't- at least not verbally. I liked to lay on my stomach and think, and once I felt settled and had reached a conclusion I felt prepared to give the result of my personal processing. During that time I began to learn how to process with others. I still am learning that same idea- and I don't think processing is always meant to be shared. But at any rate, I need to "process."

Moving.

I HATE moving. I think it is horrible. I cannot think of anything quite as exhausting as packing everything you own into a truck (that may have been too small) and hauling it a few hundred miles. By the time our apartment in Portland was spotless and empty, Kevin and I had put in three full days of just packing, cleaning, dumpster-diving for boxes, taking trips to goodwill, and to a huge dumpster- we were exhausted, depleted, emotionally and physically. We were so tired that we made it about five miles on the freeway before we had to stop for food. After we hit the road again, Kevin and I drove in silence for 4 or 5 hours. I think we were so happy to be sitting, that the silence seemed totally normal, and welcome.

We spent three blissful days in Northern California at my parent's home, and I think that saved us. We needed that time more than we even knew. We slept in, and ate yummy food, and we were able to recharge.

We arrived at our apartment to a complex of students who were preparing for finals. For 5 hours we carried, and carted everything we owned from our U-haul to our new home. We had to park in a lot around the corner where two homeless men were doing drugs. Every time we grabbed a new load we had to pull the door closed, and lock it. We probably looked crazy carrying our mattress through downtown at 11:30 on a Friday night. Aside from the help the homeless guy offered us, no one offered, or helped us carry even one box. We fell asleep that night feeling exhausted and discouraged.

Pasadena.

Things have gotten MUCH better since that first weekend here. We are enjoying the benefits of living within walking distance of everything. And the benefits of sunshine. Southern California is very different from Northern, but it might as well be the polar opposite of Portland. At first the sun made me feel a little sick, and made my eyes burn all the time. But now I am used to it again, and wonder how I lived without it. We miss our family, friends, favorite restaurants, and parks in Portland.

Job Search.

I have applied for about 10+ jobs. With online applications it is pretty easy to get the old resume out. Please pray for me. I am starting with applying for jobs mainly in Pasadena. This is definitely my preference and would be the greatest benefit for us. Kevin has already had an interview for a part time job that went very well!

Melody.

I could not have guessed how difficult this move would be for me. I am in a time of deep reflection regarding myself, and my life. It is good, but it is also somewhat draining. I feel unsure of what the Lord will require of me during this time of my life. All I am sure of is that as long as I remain faithful to him, he is faithful to me and will continue to lead me in my relationship with him, and in all aspects of my life.